Just to let everyone know, I have a new link to my Photography and I hope this site proves a lot more accessible than the last. It seems that most people were unaware that there were in fact 9 pages of photographs on the last site, so on this new site, you can just select each different album and look at all the pics in each, it should work out great. Make sure to leave comments at my email or at my guestbook about any specific photos you like...I also sell prints, so if any strike your fancy, let me know!
I love Tuesday's, by the way. Tuesday's, you see, are 88 cent day at our local movie store "Crazy Mikes," and what is even more cool, is that Tuesday's are also new releases for 99.99% of all video companies, so when these fine days roll around, you get new releases on DVD, for a mere 88 cents. I love it.
I have a crush on a woman covering the war in Iraq. hahaha. As lame as it may sound, there is this woman who reports for Fox News, and she is gorgeous, smart, funny, and all around she is "one hot little potato." This Scud Studette's name is Jennifer Eccleston and I could not find one picture of her online, so I had to embarrass myself by taking photos of the television...wow, I hope she appreciate the lengths I am going to for her. She is an embedded reporter stationed in Jordan, and when I watch her reports, despite the war going on, I wish I was embedded with her. hahaha, Pun intended. Anyways, I have three shots of her, the one her name links to, this one of her looking down, she's probably reading, but I think she's actually thinking of how sad she is she is so far from Montana; and this one where with her left eyebrow slightly raised, she is saying, "Tyler, I love you." I just know it.
On a non-Jennifer note, I have added a little system that lets you add comments about each post I do, by simply clicking where it says "Comments?" next to the time in which I posted. Feel free to leave your thoughts pertaining to each blog...but for all general, or site related questions or comments please use the Guestbook, or Email Me.
My favorite anchor Shep Smith did it again. Tonight, he was speaking to an embedded reporter, Rick, stationed with some division of troops in Iraq, and they were just constantly bantering back and forth. Anyways, near the very end of the conversation with his friend/reporter in Iraq, Shep proceeded to say: "If I didn't know any better Rick, I'd think you have had some beers, you Trickster!" After the delay, Rick got Shep's little quip, and Rick, Shep, and a Marine Commander all started giggling. I really think God put Shep on the job, to lighten everyone's spirits...soldiers, reporters, the home audience and me.
I was watching MTV today, after a two week hiadus from it due to the war, and they are currently running their Spring Break 2003 programming. At any rate, watching this, makes me wonder why I ever watched it in the first place, and I find it very odd that a War, and all the coverage of it, was what made me snap to my senses. Today the shows ranged from "Mystery Celeb Date" to "Spring Break Undercover" where they film 3 ladies, and 3 guys as they party in Miami...how completely moronic is all this? The second show just filmed these people going around, kissing unattractive people on the dance floor, and puking in garbage cans. How exciting. Anyways, I have decided that even after the war is over and Saddam is dead, I will continue to keep my TV on Fox News, and my usual rotation between the Food Network, The Learning Channel, The History Channel, Animal Planet, and Discovery. End of story.
My insane dream the other night(previous post) stuck with me all day yesterday, and tonight I was hoping I'd follow that dream up with another crazy dream...did I ever. Last night, I dreamed that my home town of Helena was under attack and the center of enemy bombing and infiltration by secret assassins. In my dream, I was some sort of religious leader, and the local Civic Center in my town(which, ironically enough is actually a mosque built by the Shriners) was where we had a giant bomb shelter, and where I would conduct services throughout the war time that our city was suffering. Anyways, in this dream, bombers were flying overhead, and the deep rumble of their engines shook the Civic Center to its core, its inhabitants with it. As we all scrambled for the shelter, a large mass of assassins ran in through the door, searching for men in power among our group to single out and kill. I saw two of my friends fall while I was trying to usher 25 or 30 women and children into the basement, and as I turned to find these men rushing around, I felt two bullets strike my chest. The impact alone sent me sprawling backwards, but I kept my feet. The man who fired the shots ran to me, ready to finish the job he'd been selected to carry out, and took aim again. His face was so familiar but for some reason I can not place who is was. As he was about to fire, I looked at him and I said, "Please do not shoot again, I want to feel what death feels like. I have to know." The man, for reasons unknown to me, granted my wish, and left me alone. I remember stumbling out of the front doors and looking up to the sky, not remembering a time I had seen it so bright, or felt the air so fresh against my face. I sat down on some steps, and laid back, I could feel the pain slipping away with the remaining life, but I was not scared. I distinctly remember feeling absolutely no fear, just a calm that spread through my body like warmth. As darkness began to wrap me, my Mom came from out of nowhere to sit with me while I slipped away. I smiled at her and told her to not be afraid. I remember dying. I remember leaving my body and looking down on it. Then, when I was thinking it was over, and the dream would end, something snapped me out of my flatline, and I woke up, sitting straight up in an ambulance, screaming down the road. The sounds of the siren gently melted into a telephone ringing, the telephone in my real house outside the dream world. Before I woke, I looked into my Mom's face, and smiled.
Imagine yourself searching for someone who has always been lost to you, in a world that does not make sense without them. A world with misshapen clouds, skies that are always the wrong color, and winds that blow so hard your skin feels loose against your bones. You are alone.
Now, Imagine that you've been searching for so many years, that time has circled back on itself and clocks twist their hands to catch up. You are walking alone on rain starved earth, you thirst like you have never tasted water and your throat is coated in sand. And then, half buried beneath a wind blown dune, you see a photo. When you bend to pick it up, the breeze lifts and carries it away, you run to it but your legs are heavy, the sand deep.
You catch it. In this white photo, a pink dress, a smile, blonde hair in curls and a look of happiness. Someone who for some reason makes you feel better, makes you feel safe and sane and free; and then, inside the boundries of the photo's frame, the person moves. They look to you, their eyes read you and they slowly whisper. They comfort you, and they say sweet nothings that somehow make the clouds look soft, and the sky blue again. Now, they make you cry, and your tears burn your cheeks...it's been so long since you've let yourself.
Now, imagine, all you want to is just to know what she smells like, the softness of her hair on your palm, how she laughs, how her tears feel dripping on your shoulder, or how far her fingers can wrap around your hand when you walk together. Imagine that you can't, and you look up and you realize the clouds are still jagged, and the sky still muddy colors that do not belong.
Alone, you realize that standing between you and those feelings, is the glossy cover of a photo. A boundary of gelatin, images of silver halide. She is smiling at me, a calm inside a world of wrong; but I cannot touch her.
I wake up with tear stained eyes, and a breath I can not catch.
I have this theory that I have been developing for sometime now, and the more years that roll past the more truth I see in it. In its simplest form, the theory states that a vast majority of people do things based on a logical progression of events, rather than acting and behaving in a manner representative of themselves, and their true desires. I shall elaborate. A person enters high school, buys the notebooks, buys the pens, studies hard, or not hard at all, and after four years graduates. Here, at this pivotal stage in life, is where my theory begins to come into play. At this point in life the aforementioned person has many choices and the paths in which they could choose to venture down twist and turn and spiral about them. Based upon my theory however, these choices and spiraling paths are blurred by logical progression, which forces so many people to go to a four year college, logically. Once at college, logically people progress to the point in which they began to wonder about the future, about their career, about the family they will come to have, so they open themselves up for love, and for that one person that completes the puzzle. Once this person is found, the remaining years of college are spent together, and once again graduation is reached. From this point, yet another pivotal stage in life, a plethora of options again open up to the person. Logial Progression strikes again, and the people move somewhere together, where the next years in their life logically progress to co-habitation, marriage, and eventually children.
Now, do not get me wrong here, logical progression is in no way a negative thing. For the people who logical progression ties directly into their wants and desires, life is amazing, but for those whom they do not, such as me, it gets interesting. When I graduate from college, I am not going to logically progress, I am going to look at all of the paths sprawled out before me and take the one I WANT. At any rate, there it is, Tyler Gregson's Theory of Logical Progression. Que interesante.
Ok, I am going to risk sounding extremely bizarre with this post. As the title of this blog indicates, something has been evading me for quite some time now. For the last year I have been searching for some charcoal gray fabric so my Mom can make a down comforter cover for me. Now, I have visited all the big name department stores, from Target to Wal-Mart and back around to the Big K and yet I have found not even one thing that is remotely close to what I want. "Why Tyler," you may ask, "haven't you gone to a fabric store?" Oh but I have, oh but I have. Jo-Ann's has been visited, and alas, Nothing. Time passes, the desire is suppressed with scholastic concerns, graduation plans, and "real world" ideas....but still the desire remains. During this period of desire suppression however, every single movie or TV show I have watched that has any scenes taking place in a bedroom serve as a giant slap in my face; every single character has a big bed covered in a giant down comforter, with a perfect charcoal gray cover. I am starting to worry that this color fabric only exists in Hollywood, and I am doomed to have to choose between light gray(known as "heather" I found out from all my hunting) or black. If anyone has any insight as to where I might find this elusive gray fabric, do not hesitate to let me know.
I watched the Gulf Storm 1 movie "Three Kings" tonight, and man I forgot how great that movie is. Dark at times, hilarious at others, and shockingly serious at the end, the movie is one of my all time favorites. The movie makes statements about the first Gulf War that were painfully true to our nation, and at one point a statement is even made that rings eeirly prophetic. Someone asked what they were doing there in Iraq, what the whole point of the first Gulf War was, and someone responded simply, "Freeing Kuwait." A brief argument about the purpose of the War came out, and the statement that is altogether too Nostradamus-ish, is when one of the men said something along the lines of, "What are we supposed to do, invade Iraq and make a whole new Vietnam War?" Wow. The movie was made in 1999, and less than 5 years later, here we are.
On a seperate note, I hate headaches. I have one right now, and I've had it for the last few hours, and it is driving me crazy. I wish I knew why there was even such a thing. When I get to Heaven, if given the opportunity to speak with God, I will ask him, "God, why did you invent headaches?" I hope he does not give me the answer that my mom always has, "So you appreciate it when you feel better..." because if He says that, I will be very let down.
Now, on a HAPPIER note...HAPPY BIRTHDAY NATALIA!!!!!!!! Everyone drop her an email and wish her a Happy 22. Just click the link above. Thanks for being such an amazing friend these past 4 years Natalia~~
The war just got a whole lot more interesting in my mind...I just watched Fox News, and they were talking about the most amazing thing I've ever seen. The Navy has deployed a great deal of "navy dolphins" that have been highly trained to swim in the ocean, up rivers, or down streams and find any and all enemy mines that have been planted underwater. They are trained so well, that they can find the mines, put either a tagging or retrieval device on them, and report back unseen and unharmed. In the early stages of this "technology" they did a comparison between human divers searching for objects and their dolpin counterparts, every single time the dolphin found its object on the first try, the human never found it at all.
I had random thoughts today, I like these days. Today I thought what an amazing invention the zipper is. I can not imagine what made someone think up those tiny little metal teeth slipping together. For some reason, I just stared at the zipper on my sweatshirt today and couldn't quite believe its simple ingenuity. Today at the Salvation Army's new store in Helena I thought that it is a very bad sign when the doors entering and exiting a Salvation Army or Goodwill are the high-tech sensor ones, that open and close automatically, couldn't that money have gone somewhere more Salvation-ish? A guy at the Verizon Wireless store today was very upset about the price of an AC Adaptor for his phone...he had tight jeans on, a grungy dark green tshirt on, a funny goatee, workers boots, and said "God Damn" a lot. I thought he was being unreasonable towards the girl helping him. Apparently he can "find a better God Damn deal on an adaptor somewhere else." Tonight I watched part of the Miss USA contest, I thought it was too bad that they narrow it down to the Top 10 in the first 5 minutes of the show, why even have the other 40 girls, I feel bad for them. I had to get a new cell phone today, my old one broke, which explains why I saw the upset AC Adaptor man, but after getting the phone I thought that perhaps I am getting a lot of microwave radiation in my head from having a cell phone. I hope not. I saw a kid today who had his mouth wired nearly shut due to his braces, I thought how bad that would be, and how I would drink a lot of Gatorade through straws if I were him. Probably just Gatorade, I'm allergic to milk so milkshakes are out. Today, I wondered if people who had body piercings beeped through metal detectors in airports, and if so, are they embarrased when they have to show the root of the beep? I think Techno music recycles the exact same bass line for every single song in the last 30 years, just changes the speed of it, or they pull a Vanilla Ice and add one cymbal smash in there somewhere to make it "different." I wondered today how many people I know have Blog Sites that I do not know about...probably not many, but I wish more would. I thought today how great Mother's are, mine made cookies with little Easter shapes inside them today while I was out running errands. Those were not all the thoughts I thought, I think there were a lot more, but that is enough for now.
Thing One: Ari Fleischer is most likely the most unhappy, and smug man I've ever watched on television. I watched the White House press briefing, and he was so rude to every single reporter, and every single question asked. Why would you sign up for the job of Press Secretary if you were going to be such a smug, aloof, moron about it? Seriously, the entire time I was watching him you could Feel his annoyance with every person in the room; he acts as though he's fielding questions about a working-model of a volcano he just built for the 7th Grade Science Fair, and he has no idea how to answer them. No blue ribbon for you Ari.
Thing Two: Hands down, the coolest news anchor Ever, has to be Shepard "Shep" Smith. Today while I was watching his show "Studio B," he was doing a little interview Q&A with one of his colleagues that runs a radio show, and that's when his true colors came out. The guy he was talking to praised Fox News and how amazing they were doing, and especially how good the reporters in the field, like Oliver North were doing...anyways, the radio man said how cool Oliver North was, and "Shep" goes: "I know, I talked to Ollie on the phone just the other day dude." A news anchor saying Dude...I love it. Ok, and if that were not enough, a few minutes later the same radio man also praised Shep for his steadfastness on the job, to which Shep responded with, "Well wow, Thank You my Brotha." Again...I love it. Shep then proceeded to end his "Studio B" with another funny thing; he was describing Saddam's readiness to use chemical weapons on his own people, but he did not word it like any ordinary news anchor, oh no, he chose instead to say the following: "The Marines are doing an exceptional job, but they really do have to be careful around civilian areas, not only because they are often soldiers dressed as civilians, but Saddam has shown time and again, that he is down with gassing his own people." hahaha. Pure Shep Style. Shep Smith, You are the man.
Ok, does anyone else out there feel really strange when watching the war news? I just got done watching the Centcom briefing, and they were speaking about the "skirmish" that U.S. troops encountered in the town of An N?sirïyah. At any rate, when I say "strange," I really am trying to express the way that my mind works when battles, or fire-fights such as these are discussed on the news. Does anyone else find themselves imagining clips of movies such as "Black Hawk Down" or "We Were Soldiers" or any other of the hundreds of war movies out there? The entire time An N?sirïyah was being discussed, I could see bullets flying past soldiers hiding behind shoddy urban walls, explosions lifting red dust off the never to be paved streets that crisscross the town, Iraqi's in white robes with thick mustaches, all of the above taking place in super-slo-mo in my mind to a musical score by Hans Zimmer or someone, with the woman from the "Gladiator" soundtrack wailing in the background. I just wonder if anyone else's sense of reality is being blurred and melding into Hollywood films...which also raises the question, are movies becoming far too "realistic" and bringing people closer to such horrible events, or is society becoming so desensitized that hearing of such awful things in the news just becoming commonplace and routine to a point that it feels like a movie? Or perhaps it is a combination of the two...one thing leading to another. What do you people think? I am looking for some responses to this post, so please either Sign My Guestbook, or Mail Me . Either one works. Hope to hear some reactions.
I do not know if the claims are true, I do not know if the video's are authentic, but I feel sick. I do not understand, if this turns out to be reality, how Human Beings, can have such disregard for life. I understand the contradictions that are inherent in what I say, as I have posted before about the necessity of this War, and some disregard for human life comes with that, but this is different. Thinking about those American's caputured, interrogated, and tortured makes me physically ill, and makes me want to cry. Perhaps it is simple naiveté, perhaps it is youth, I do not know, but I can not fully comprehend this type of evil. I can not understand a level of hate in someone that burns so bright that they could videotape themselves stealing the life out of another human. I just do not understand, and I am sick, sick of all of this. I have never seen war up close, I have always been safe behind the soft glow of the television screen and I pray I never have to, but this recent development and stories from old prisoners of war are Haunting me.
I was thinking today about albums that have changed my life, or left a huge dent in my memory...albums that stand out as representing to me a certain time in my life, something I've gone through, times I've laughed, cried, whatever. So, I decided to compile a brief list of some of the albums that will always stick out as most influential in my life. Some of them are as follows(in no order):
1. The Joshua Tree - U2. Hands down, the most influential album of my entire life. I do not know how I started loving U2, or when it happened, but I do know it was Forever ago. This album has more memories behind it than any album I own, or have ever listened to. From old girlfriends, to singing "Running to Stand Still" with one of the most amazing people I've ever met, Sven from Stokholm, Sweden; This album, as well as many others by U2 have been so important in my life. U2 will always be my favorite band, and this album always the best.
2. ( ) - Sigur Ros. I first heard Sigur Ros when I watched the movie "Vanilla Sky" and fell in love as their song "Njosnavelin(The Nothing Song)" played throughout the final scenes. I have been a HUGE fan ever since, and that was over a year and a half ago. I have never heard music like Sigur Ros, and the only way I can even attempt to explain it, is pretend you are dying, and you are floating up towards Heaven, and all you can hear is singing you can not translate, in a language you've never heard. That's how I feel when I listen to them.
3. Welcome to the Cruel World - Ben Harper. I really got into Ben Harper after my sister Rian brought home this album from college her freshman year. I listened to this album, especially "Pleasure and Pain" and "Walk Away" my junior and senior year of High School, and thoughts of that last year, and graduation always come with them.
4. Greatest Hits Vol. II and Blood on the Tracks - Bob Dylan. Arguably the most amazing singer/songwriter of all time. The lyrical genius of these albums inspired me to write more poetry, and the music itself inspired me to start playing the guitar. I love both of these albums.
5. 40oz. To Freedom and Sublime - Sublime. Both of these albums were on extremely heavy rotation my Junior year of High School. 99% of my time during that year was spent with a girl named Cody Harris and all of her close friends, who soon became my close friends. At any rate, one of these two albums was playing every day that I spent with them. I came to love both of these albums, and it really is sad that Bradley had to die. Both of these are amazing, and I love the songwriting.
6. Songs You Know By Heart - Jimmy Buffett. My love for Jimmy Bufffett is not measurable. Essentially, his music represents everything I have ever wanted in life: tropical weather, a good hammock, gentle breeze, good sunset, beautiful women, salty air, soft sounds of waves...Perfect. My friend Greg Dorrington got me interested in Buffett, and this was the album he started me off with. This song floods me with memories of golfing at Bill Roberts Golf Course, riding in Kurt's beat up Jeep, hitting Dairy Queen and getting Mr. Freezies before 9 holes. Man, Spring and Summer time drip from this album...I now own nearly all of his, but this was the first, and will always have a place in my heart.
Well, there are a few albums that I can not live without. The memories and inspirations surrounding them are deeply embedded into my mind and heart. Anyways, check them out if you so desire. There are sound clips for each and every album listed if you just click the Album Title. I do not know what I would do without music.
On the drive home from Missoula to Helena today, I thought a few weird thoughts, well the thoughts weren't weird, but what I thought about was. First of all, how weird is driving? It is so amazing that we're sitting still, in a comfortable chair, sometimes comfortable, mere inches from the pavement, all the while travelling at a ridiculous rate of motion towards some destination...Weird. Also, how weird is it that at some point, people actually believed the Earth was flat? I looked at the sky today, and it is really funny to me that after looking at the massive DOME SHAPED structure that blankets the Earth, people back then still thought there was a decent chance that we lived on something flat. Lastly, how weird is it when your stomach growls? I know, I know, it is just the acids in your stomach churning and trying to digest or whatever, but seriously, it's one of the coolest, weirdest, and sometimes embarrasing functions that our body has...how cool is it your body can talk to you when it needs nourishment? I love it.
Anyways, I'm home in Helena now, and I'm planning on hanging out with my Mom and my awesome little dog Gertie. How weird is being home? hahaha.
Again I woke today to the pictures of Baghdad being completely decimated, "strategically," by American tomahawk missiles. I started thinking, how much of a razor's edge America and the Coalition are marching on currently; the whole concept of having to ask Turkey for permission to use their airspace baffles me right now. The reason I say we're truly walking on the razor's edge, is because the degree of restraint that is so vital in this, or any war, is amazing...how easy it would be to just forget about what Turkey does, or does not want, and use their airspace at our will, what will they do shoot our fighters down? I honestly believe that after this war is over, and the ashes have settled once again, that no country in this world will have the audacity to even attempt to stand up to us again. This war truly could push us over the image of a "superpower" and into the entirely new realm of complete domination. Honestly, what country would even dream of challenging a nation that has such an intense force at its call, with the support of so many other nations behind it? I just hope we stay on the right side of that razor's edge.
"Casualty." I have heard this word with increased frequency on the news tonight, as a helicopter went down and 12 Coalition soldiers lost their lives. How awful a name for the death of a human being. I hate the way it makes death feel like something so routine. "12 Casualties in a helicopter crash outside Kuwait..." it rolls off the tongue with such ease, and that drives me crazy; granted the word comes from the Latin "câsuâlis" meaning Fortuitous, or "happening by chance or accident." Nevertheless, I think an heir to Webster needs to step forward, and come up with a word for death, especially in the context of war, that echoes it much more respect.
That little quote, from U2's song "If God Would Send His Angels" feels entirely appropriate right now. I could not sleep last night, so I just sat there in bed, switching between CNN,MSNBC, and Fox News. That is when I really became aware of the absurdity of this "modern age" that we find ourselves in; I was falling asleep to a War, broadcasted Live and in Real Time all over the world. Military Analysts, Wolf Blitzers, gas masks, and air raid sirens filled the screen, and I slept to the sounds of a city beginning to fall. When I woke up, the screen was painted with the familiar green of the night scope that became so popular during the first Gulf War, and I opened my eyes just in time to see tiny white tracers going from Earth to sky, and again from sky to Earth. I felt like I was watching a video game, or a cartoon movie, but this is reality, and that fact frightens me. The line following the quote in the title of this blog is, "If God will send his Angels/And if God would send a sign..." and I think now, more than ever, the world needs to re-evaluate, and start to wonder what God is thinking up there, when so many horrible things are done in His name. I shudder to think how many have died, "In the name of God."
Alright, I added a guestbook, to make an easier way for people to leave comments about my site, or the content of the site...so Please start leaving some comments, either at the Guestbook link above the Email Me link, above the Walt Whitman quote or send me an email, either way, let me know. Thanks all.
Well, I posted a link to my Poetry finally. Keep in mind while reading it, that some of them are VERY old, I'm talkin like back to Freshman year of High School Old. At any rate, I hope you enjoy. Please feel free to Email Me with comments and such, I really want to hear what people think. Anyways, the link will permanently reside in the links bar on the right, so check it out at your leisure.
On another note, with the possibility of bombs being dropped in less than an hour, I am extremely worried about the outcome of this whole endeavor. God Bless all those soldiers brave enough to put themselves on the line. Now we hold our collective breath, and wait.
"They say that dreams are only real as long as they last. Couldn't you say the same thing about life? " --Man With the Long Hair--
"The trick is to combine your waking rational abilities with the infinite possibilities of your dreams. Because, if you can do that, you can do anything. " --Guy Forsyth--
Man, what a day today...I had two big exams, one in Abnormal Psychology, and another in Native American Relgions and Philosophies. At any rate, I am very excited to be done with all that. After my test in Native American, I did the coolest thing. I sat outside my class and sat on the bench with my eyes shut, and tried the practice of Zazen Meditation. Pretty much, I just sat there with my eyes closed, and I focused only on all the sounds that were going on. I tell you, you can hear a lot of weird stuff when you leave your eyes shut and let herds of people walk past you.
Off topic, but is anyone else out there really sick of Hip-Hop and Rap music?? I swear to God, if hear that 50cent guy say "Go shorty, it's your birthday...blah blah, in the club" one more time I am going to smash my TV screen with a platinum necklace, or 20 inch rims.
I was on campus today, and I went in the the University Center, the UC for all those familiar, and immediatley upon going in I heard the loud, familiar sounds of Buddhist Monks chanting. As you may, or may not know, I have been extremely enthralled with Buddhism for a long time, probably dating back to the day my Dad brought back The Teaching of Buddha from his trip to Saudi Arabia. I remember from the first time I opened it, I was hooked...since that day, I've taken classes, and read a great deal about this amazing Religion. At any rate, I walked over to the source of the sound, and I saw something I've always wanted to see: Tibetean Buddhist Monks kneeling down and creating an amazing mandala out of brightly colored sand. This process takes anywhere up to a few weeks, and in the case of the mandala here, upon completion this Friday, they will dismantle it, to see how click the mandala link, and after dismantling it they will empty the sand into the middle of the Clark Fork River. They do this with the believe that peace and love will follow each bright grain of sand wherever the river decides to take it.
Anyhow, immediatly after watching this mandala making process, and looking around at ways to continue to give to the Free Tibet Campaign, I had to go to my billiards class. When I got in to the classroom I saw the most blaring contradiction I can remember. Two Buddhist Monks, in full robes, hunched over a pool table shooting a game of 8 Ball. In the background for this surreal scene, was the music of White Zombie at top volume. How completely strange. From watching them shoot pool for nearly an hour, I have never learned as powerful a lesson about the essence of Buddhism...I tell you this, I've never seen two people care less about whether the ball went in or not, they were just happy to play.
I was surfing around this amazing little time-robber that is the Internet, when I came across this quote: "We sleep safely in our beds because rough men stand ready in the night to visit violence on those who would harm us." - George Orwell - At any rate, it really got me thinking about the War that is so seemingly inevitable. I live in a city, the city sits nestled inside a valley surrounded by high mountain walls and meandering streams; this valley sits inside this state called Montana, right above the "nose" on the far western side of the state; and this state sits inside the boundaries of these United States. This city I live in, is arguably the most liberal of all the large cities in Montana, and also has, arguably, the largest percentage of people who are, or who were at sometime happy to call themselves hippies. These Missoulians are very against the war that is creeping up on us and are extremely vocal about this fact. The more signs they put up, the more protests they organize, and the more media attention they get, the more I have trouble siding with them. Don't get me wrong, I am not saying I am pro-war, because it truly is a terrible thing for anyone to lose their life, but I fail to see the logic in these extremely noisy, often vocally violent Anti-War picketers. As the quote very eloquently notes, we as a nation can sleep safely in our beds, because far away on some distant battlefield, there are people just like me risking their lives for an ideal, and to me, protesting the war that they are so willing to join for that ideal, is a slap in the face of all of those who keep us safe. I have nothing but respect for these men and women who put themselves in harms way, risking all they have, to keep an unappreciative nation safe and sound.
I just got off the phone with my friend Kevin Hanson and I am more jacked than ever about our future trip to New Zealand. There has always been a fire lit inside me to get out and really see what this huge world has to offer, but it has been totally accentuated and made a lot stronger this year with the media explosion about the country. I've always wanted to visit the country, but seeing it 3 days out of 7 on the Travel Channel really does keep the spark alive. Also, I just got done watching The Beach and the movie made me realize how much the "backpacker" lifestyle really would suit me...you know, going from beautiful place to beautiful place to learn so much about other cultures, and a lot more about yourself. Wow, I really can't wait.
Ok, my friend Natalia and I were eating oranges a few minutes ago, and now I have an important question: Did oranges ever, or do oranges currently, have seeds? We each bought 10 oranges for $1.00 and I swear to you, not one single orange has had a seed. I am thinking that the only explanation is that the same scientists who came up with the brilliant idea of deseeding grapes had their hand in this orange fiasco. So if anyone knows the answer, Please Email Me. I suppose this whole orange question really brings up another question...why is money being spent on methods in which seeds can be removed from an orange, when we still have no cure for AIDS, or even the friggen common cold? The things our country spends money on is amazing.
I started running tonight. There is a track down the hill from my apartment that today was nothing more than soft, wet mud. I decided to start running, so I did, and I started my laps around that soft mud track in the moonlight. 2 miles later, I was done with my first night.
When I got back to my apartment, I heard a guy singing in my complex, ordinarily this is no big deal, but he was singing "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For." The way he sang it, at a much higher pitch, and with the emotion and voice that reminded me of Chris Robinson of the Black Crowes, was unbelievable. $5.00 later, I own his self-produced debut CD, and I made a new friend. Everyone should check him out...the money I spent for his CD is going for gas money to get him to the next town; how someone with this much talent can be needing gas money is beyond me. At any rate, his name is Jaik Willis, and you can access his site here. Good Luck Jaik.
Photography is an amazing hobby. I shoot with both a digital camera and a regular 35mm SLR, and I love the way both capture life standing still. I decided to toss my Photo Album on here so other people can see the way I look at the world through the lens...it is just a sample of my work, but I think it gives a pretty good idea of the things I love.
How strange are people? Today in my Montana Writers class, I looked around and realized how completely strange people really are. First through the door walks a guy about 5'11, 175lbs and of Native American ethnicity...normal enough right? Oh no, he is dressed in maroon velvet higwater pants, a shiny blue nike exercise tanktop jersey, a ragin' Tat on each arm, and to top the whole ensemble off...Wooden Clogs straight out of Holland. He sits in the corner and says things like "cultural paradigm," "ethnic impossibility," and quotes Bram's Stroker's "Dracula." Taken together, that is one powerful index of incompatibility all wrapped up into one man.
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