Wednesday, April 30, 2003
On a totally unrelated note, I think everyone should GO HERE and when you get there, type in any webaddress you can think of. It will put it into the language of Snoop Dogg. Warning: Swearing and a lot of "z's" in words will be present.
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Tuesday, April 29, 2003
Monday, April 28, 2003
Maybe I'm wrong, but honestly I am tired of watching the manager waltz out to the mound to pull a pitcher at the first sign of trouble. Send the Pitching Coach out, and let him do his job. Let the connection between Pitcher and Coach during troublesome times of a game be rekindled, and I think we'd all be amazed at the outcome. It's time to throw it back to the innocence and purity of the game that exists in the Minors, when people play for hardly anything a month, ride 10 hour bus rides to cities like Reno, Palm Springs, Visalia, or Salinas, and slide into first base or throw at a hitter based on principle alone. A time when clubhouses were decked out with a large room with 4 showerheads, frozen lasagna trays to split amongst 25 starving guys, little white folding chairs and Max Patkins...warning tracks with golf balls littered in them from the neighboring country club. Teams that used hand-me-down uniforms, caps with the mesh backs, and had "Ball Park Annie's" that looked like the girls that couldn't get backstage at a Van Halen concert. I miss the days of summer with my Dad, going on road trips and staying in the worst motels in each city, eating 'dinner' at 7-11 consisting of month-old tuna salad sandwiches, yellow Gatorade, and oatmeal cookies, the "healthy" part of the meal in case Mom asked. Baseball isn't the pastime of America, it IS America. It's the American dream embodied in a game, a simple game with 9 players a tiny white leather ball, and a wooden stick. Players start in the rookie leagues, play through A ball, Double A, Triple A, and if they're lucky, the Big Show...it's Manifest Destiny, it's progress, it is the American Spirit, in a game. I truly believe that if the players in the Major Leagues played with the intensity and purity of players that are stuck in the Minor's, the game would reinvent itself, and silently slip back to its roots. There are guys that are "lifers" in the Minor Leagues that play with more passion and more intensity than 99% of the players I see on ESPN today, and for what? I hate to be cliché but it is for nothing more than the love of the game of baseball. I also might be biased, but I see that intensity in my Dad, the very spirit that makes the game so great. He's worked his butt off for well over 20 years, made his way from A Ball to AAA as a Player, then got injured. The injury didn't stop him, and he became a coach, again working his way from Rookie Ball, to AAA and finally the Major Leagues. I may be biased, but I know that he is not appreciated like he should be, he is not respected as much as he has earned, and his talent is not utilized anywhere close to as much as baseball needs.
Though I know it will not happen, I will continue to hope. I will continue to hope that players will remember what it was like to ride on broken down buses with the air-conditioning turned up so high that the whole team would wake up with a cold, the feeling of hitting a homerun out of a park "filled to capacity" with 2,000 fans, getting blindsided during a brawl over a brush back, or the family section of the stands filled with little blonde kids like me--dressed up in a tiny little uniform replicating his Dad's. It has been a long time since I've been on the field with my Dad, or shagged fly balls with the boys of summer, but I remember it so well. The smell of fresh leather warmed in the sun, the sight of fresh cut grass and the infield after it has been dragged, the taste of sunflower seeds parching the insides of my cheek, the pain of chasing a fly ball after too much bubblegum and Lemon-Lime Gatorade. The sounds of a cracking bat, the rush of taking batting practice, the casual thrill of playing Pepper, and the feeling of walking tall out of the clubhouse so many kids my age would have killed to get into. These things shaped my youth and I am forever changed by them. I want baseball to go to back to this, back to it's youth.
To all who remember it this way, I am sure you will agree. To Baseball, wise up. To my Dad, Thank You.
Saturday, April 26, 2003
Knott: What amount of money would it take to get you to eat human flesh?
Kevin Smith: how much of it
Knott: like a steak size amount
Kevin Smith: hmm
Kevin Smith: well if it was a good cut, probably around 10 dollars
Kevin Smith: actually I might do it for free
Kevin Smith: depending on how it was cooked
What a nut. I was thinking about it, and there is really no amount of money that could get me to do it, the only way I'd ever even consider it, is if it was a last resort to survival, and the person was already dead. What a freaky thought though...sorry if the morbidity of this freaked anyone out.
Friday, April 25, 2003
On a non-sick note, I am trying to figure out a job for this summer, and I am welcoming not only suggestions, but job offers for anyone reading this blog. Hopefully someone out there will feel some generosity and ask me to work for them, at the same time paying me a bundle. I'd like that a lot. Seriously though, people should drop me some comments and let me know what they think I should do.
Finally, it's my Mom's birthday tomorrow, everyone should E-Mail her and say Happy Birthday and whatever else you want to add! HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM!
"Then he said, 'Well, we'll be there to gun you down and kill your family too.' Before the word too was out of this guy's mouth, I had gone into full combat mode. I spun and took his right arm and brought it up into a half nelson. I'm very fortunate to have trained with the Navy SEALs and the 101st Airborne. So I put all my training into effect, took him into custody, and turned him in to the local authorities. Shemane was quite upset by the whole thing. But I wasn't upset at all, man, I was digging it." --Ted Nugent--
How cool is he? VERY cool my friends. Very cool.
The title of my blog tonight does not reflect the current jean styles, or the remaining members of Led Zeppelin, nor does it reflect the lack of gloss on an old time photograph. Tonight, faded refers to my own, as well as America's interest in the War in Iraq. When the whole fiasco broke out I was glued to the television like a fly to those neon blue buzzing lights. I was captivated and astounded by the Generals, Majors, Colonels, Wolf Blitzer's, Shep Smiths, and yes, Jennifer Ecclestons. I'd leave the news on at night, and wake to it in the morning, waking my eyes to the sights and sounds of American military dominance. Now, the TV is weeping for MSNBC's absence, sobbing for Shep's disappearance. Newspapers are left rolled up tight with rubber bands on my floor for days until I have the time to unwrap them and reacquaint myself with "current events." Entertainment has seeped back into my life silently; overthrowing the War coverage like it never existed. The flurries of daily carnage and fatalities have been replaced with Major League Baseball, movies, and the Stanley Cup Playoffs. Even my blogs are representative of this change. During the War, nearly everything on my mind that ended up online was concerning some aspect of the war, the media's coverage, or my own personal thoughts on the topic...now look, not a mention for days. Where did this apathy come from? How did it leak and steal its way into my life? Over-exposure, overdoses of News broadcasts, and a complete lack of a "challenge" in Iraq? I do not know. I do know that we have all moved on from this, at a seemingly alarming speed. I never wonder what is going on, I never even care. I do not know how we are rebuilding, when we are rebuilding, or even if we are rebuilding. I am lost, and I am faded. Perhaps this is a good thing, perhaps it is unhealthy for me, and Americans alike, to be captivated by live broadcasts of gun battles, daily reports of "Coalition Fatalities." Perhaps the time has come for each of us to cleanse ourselves of the blood that stains America's hands, and try to step forward. At any rate, our interest has faded like stars at dawn, and I do not know how to feel about it.
Wednesday, April 23, 2003
On another, equally annoying note, why is it that every customer service line, for every company in the world employ people from India, or Pakistan, or somewhere, with accents so strong you haven't the foggiest idea what in God's Holy Name they are saying? I don't care if it's the credit card company, Qwest, or American Eagle, there is a 99% chance you won't have a clue what they are saying. I have nothing against India, or Pakistan, or whatever, but seriously at least enforce some sort of weeding out process to toss out the people who sound like Gandhi underwater. Anymore you have to spend $100,000 on a college education to speak the number of languages required to remedy a $2.95 charge. Ridiculous.
Lastly, it's a beautiful day, and my Dad's Game is on ESPN. Just click on GAMEDAY, and you can follow it pitch-by-pitch if you so desire.
P.S. This post is not posted last night, it is actually Thursday afternoon.
Tuesday, April 22, 2003
True Romance is by far one of my favorite movies; despite the fact, or possibly due to the fact that it is extremely violent, extremely controversial, and the most unconventional "romantic" movie of all time. The story is of Clarence and Alabama, two characters with so much innocence and vulnerability, wrapped up in a world they have to adapt to. Anyways, my post is not about this amazing film, oh no, it's about the love I have for Alabama Whorley in the movie. If anyone out there wants to know the exact sound of the laugh that will end up catching me and making me fall head over heels in love, watch this movie. Patricia Arquette's laugh is perfect. The scene in which this perfection is clearly displayed is this: Directly after the two watch the Sonny Cheba Triple Feature at the movie theater, Alabama asks Clarence if he'd like to go to a diner and get a piece of pie with her. After she asks, she laughs, and I'm hooked. I do not know what it is, but she laughs at random times throughout the movie, sometimes interrupting her own speech patterns to giggle just a little. With all of the things a woman possesses in which to snag my attention and affection how strange that the thing I want the most in a mate, is a good laugh. Honesty drips from laughter.
Monday, April 21, 2003
Off topic but in my heart always, I miss BottleCaps candy. I know they still make them in random places and online, but they do not sell them ANYWHERE in roll form in Missoula anymore. One gas station used to have them, and I'd buy them in the box-load to ensure I had my fix. They are amazing little candies, and I am weeping for their absence.
Sunday, April 20, 2003
I shot off a rocket today. I am the rocketman. My little cousin Jacob had these homemade rockets with firework engines, and I got to push the blast off button. The rocket I chose was 3 feet tall, brilliant blue with a bright silver streak curling its way down to the tailfins. 3...2...1...Then it lifted off into the sky. The parachute on my rocket did not work, but the little shuttle flew about 200 feet into the air, and then fell back to the earth about half as fast. All in all, I am the rocket man.
On a totally unrelated note, does anyone else out there get millions of junk mails to their real, postal mail address? I swear to you I get more offers for credit cards, vacations, coupons, and local Missoula mailings than any human being. The type of mail that comes most often however, truly perplexes me...The Free Internet CD's. I'd love to know how much money AOL wastes each year to send out the millions upon millions of free Internet Access cd's, tightly wrapped in their own metal packaging. Can you imagine how many metal cases must be created in order to deliver all these worthless cd's to all these people who in reality do not want them? I wonder how many things could be built with all these wasted metal containers, how much money could be saved. Honestly AOL, just stop it.
Lastly, Happy Easter to everyone. Easter is an intense holiday with its historical and Biblical basis, and I find it very interesting to see the direction it has turned. Don't get me wrong, I love very much getting baskets of candy, toys and little surprises, but I wonder how it ever evolved to this. A day that used to come as rejoicing after the sorrow of Good Friday, has now become a day in which a bunny rabbit delivers sweets to people in basket form. Very interesting. I'd love to trace the evolution somehow. Christmas as well.
Saturday, April 19, 2003
The P.P.S. is the topic of the day, as Brandon Kiesling and Kevin Smith and I were discussing it. So any other males that read this blog, please comment to me, or sign the guestbook. P.P.S. refers to the post pee shiver. I think that it's a phenomenon entirely belonging to the male race that we shiver after we urinate sometimes. It seems to me, that the length of time spent abstaining from that urination directly affects the length and strength of the shiver. Every female I have ever talked to is in the dark about this amazing characteristic of the male race, but nevertheless, it is quite funny. Both Brandon and Kevin tonight confirmed that they indeed have experienced this, and I am curious to see how many other men have as well. I urge anyone to comment about this, so we can see if it is truly a male phenomenon, or if females get it to, or even odder, if it is just a Montana thing.
On a seperate note, I am playing Track 4 by Sigur Rós again, as I decided today that it is the song I want at my funeral, the only song. For all of you who don't know, I want a viking funeral in which I am put onto a boat filled with fireworks and explosives, pushed out to sea, and then all my friends and families are given bows and flaming arrows to shoot at my boat. Amazing way to go out, especially with this song playing in the background. It is not morbid, it is just planning ahead.
Friday, April 18, 2003
Jimmy Buffett is sliding its way through my eardrums; I think we all know what that means. Ok maybe only a select few people do, so for those of you who don't, it means Spring/Summer is here baby. Today, my good pal Natalia and I went out into this tiny triangular park near where we live and had a great time enjoying the sun. I sported some shorts, sandals, and nothing else...let me tell you it was Heaven. I love the first few days of really amazing weather, when girls are in sundresses, or better yet, in swimsuits tanning all over the place, the only requirement being enough square footage of lawn to lay a towel down; when guys like me come out of the woodwork to show the world their mayonnaise colored skin, Michael Jackson white from winter hibernation. We were both in such good moods with this weather that we even busted out the FoxTail and tried our best to throw it accurately. Did not work so well, but at times a good throw or two was tossed. I highly endorse the FoxTail, it's a great way to waste time outside; not only that, it allows people who can't catch things a great chance at success.
Seriously though, how amazing is this time of year? I always feel like I just woke up from a long nap and I am seeing everything with fresh eyes. I think that everyone, whether they think so or not, has Seasonal Affective Disorder. Which is the disorder that gives people the negative sensations and dysfunctions, both physically and mentally, that come along with extended periods of bad weather, gloomy skies, snowy earth, and lack of sunshine. The cool thing about the disorder is that in 99.99% of people it goes away with the first signs of new life in springtime. I fully admit that I am one of these people, which is why I know for sure that I need to end up living somewhere with a very short winter, and very white beach sand. I just hope whoever lives there can put up with my temporary blinding whiteness that is coating my upper-body like face paint on a mime. Any ladies in sundresses or swimsuits that are comfortable tanning on a towel-sized strip of earth feel free to join me.
Wednesday, April 16, 2003
Today I realized that I am weird. Perhaps I am not the weirdest person you know, but I am probably in the Top 10 list. So, to offer a glimpse into my oddities I decided that I'd blog a few of the things that make me who I am...bear with me. Here we go:
Sometimes when I'm just sitting around one of my socks mysteriously disappears from my foot, usually the left, and ends up either lost somewhere in the room, or slung over my shoulder. I have no idea why I do this, but I quite often find myself standing up and wondering why one foot is so much colder than the other. For some reason I don't understand the concept of babies, and of midgets.(little people, I don't know the Politically Correct term) Seriously, they just baffle me. Look at a baby for example, when they are born the amount of skin that is covering their bodies would not fully wrap around one of my legs, yet somehow they GROW, they make more skin out of nothing, and 20 years later they are like 4 times the size, and the skin still fits them. That is insane. I make my check marks backwards to the way most people make them...most people do the little portion first, and then the long tail of the checkmark with flair...not me...I do the long tail first and then end on the stubby little end. Before I go anywhere, I always think I have to go pee, even if I really don't. I carry my mini Nalgene water bottle everywhere I go, but throughout the course of a day I probably drink about 3 sips. If I'm walking with someone, guy or girl, and I am carrying things, chances are that thing will end up in your hands, and I really don't know why it does. I sleep naked a majority of the time. I have absolutely NO sense of time. Seriously 10 minutes to me feels like 4 and a half hours, and at the same time, 4 and a half hours can feel like 10 minutes. I never know what time it is, what day of the month, or heck, even what day of the week it is. I also have no sense of direction. I can live in a town for 100 years and still not know the names of any streets, the fastest way to get to anywhere, whatever. Whenever I drive long distances, say it's to Helena from Missoula, an hour or so trip, I always have to leave for the highway directly from my house. Realize that if there are errands that need to be ran before I leave, I will run the errands, then come back to my house to finish packing up, then leave. I hate making stops before I hit the highway. I can not say the word cinnamon...the only way I can come close is if I say "sinn-a-mon" with a 2 second pause in between each portion of the word. I hate food that might be old, I will seriously throw stuff away even if it was made the day before if it even looks bad, if it smells bad, it's gone. If I am watching movies with people, I think it's completely acceptable for me to fall asleep...if someone else is falling asleep first however, there will be hell to pay and I nag them until they are back to being completely awake. When I am driving, it is everyone else that is a horrible driver, and I can't stand pedestrians and people on bikes. I'm all for saving the environment, but seriously just ride on the sidewalk...to me a bike is NOT another automobile. I frequently make comments like, "TURN OFF YOUR BRIGHTS!" to people who pass me at night, for some reason even dims look really bright to me. Apparently I am told I put on chapstick like a total moron, I rub it on with the stick first, then I use my finger to rub it in more. As my sisters says, "That is what the stick is for!" I always have little surprises for people, even if it is just something lame like a piece of candy or something, I always come up with little surprises. Whenever I get into an argument with people, I get bored halfway through and start smiling...within two minutes the argument is over because I have the other person laughing at how much of a moron I am. I don't like going to class because I think that it will blunt my originality, just like John Nash, the schizo math man. I always make ultimatums on myself, such as "I'm NEVER eating McDonalds again," and I ask people around me to help keep those ultimatums, but if the next day I want McDonalds, I insist that the person let me off the hook, and that I'll start that ultimatum later. I insist on sewing nearly all things that I wear if they rip or tear, and I love to add things to my clothes that aren't there, whether it's a patch, a drawing, anything. I wear a belt frequently, but for some reason it will come undone on it's own and sometimes the top button too, and I end up just walking around with my pants either unbuttoned or the belt hanging out. I am obsessed with fire. I can stare at a match or a lighter or a fire burning for hours on end. I also love burning things just to see how they'll react to the flames. I have an incredible pain tolerance for self-inflicted pain. I used to win bets by putting out incense on my arm, eating matches, or cutting myself...young and dumb. For some reason I have the most amazing memory when it comes to actors and actresses in movies. I don't know how or why but I somehow just know so much about movies, about who's in them, what other movies the've been in, etc...pretty much don't mess with me in the Kevin Bacon Game.
Well, that list turned out to be a lot longer than I anticipated. Thank you to Natalia and McGraw for helping share their ideas about how weird I am. They are the reason the list is so huge, I was gonna stop at like 5 things, but apparently I'm a lot weirder than I thought. Weird.
Tuesday, April 15, 2003
Today in my Abnormal Psychology class I came in prepared to take an exam. Little did I know the exam was moved to Thursday, so I ended up sitting through a documentary about John Nash; for all of you who do not know who he is, he was the mathematician played brilliantly by Russell Crowe in "A Beautiful Mind." Anyhow, the movie essentially chronicled the rise, and heartbreaking fall of Nash's career due to Paranoid Schizophrenia. Near the end of class however, is when I began to question what I was absorbing. The end of the film spoke about how John Nash eventually beat his schizophrenia by what he referred to as "willing my way out of it." It was here that my Professor decided to step in and claim that Nash most likely did not “will” his way out of anything; she claimed that it was most likely the simple deterioration of his disease, or the silent slip into tolerance that only comes after so many years of dealing with it. I could not disagree more.
First of all, Nash was a genius. John Nash did more for his field than the majority of his colleagues in the past 50 years; solving proofs and theorems that drove many other “stable” mathematicians to the brink of madness. To say he was incapable of rationalizing himself through schizophrenia is absurd. Through the years that he was tortured by the emotional collapse, loss of career, and the voices of his subconscious, Nash was in the front row to witness the nature of his disease. Who better than a genius to “will” his way out of something like this?
At any rate, the film started me thinking about the capabilities of the human mind. I would love to hear some feedback on this, as I’m really curious what others think…but do you think that people are capable of healing themselves of disease, or any other ailments, mental or physical, using only their minds? I think that humans are more than able to cure themselves of anything from a headache, to the schizophrenia that Nash defeated. The percentage of our brains that we’re not using is astounding, and if someone finds a way to open themselves to even touching on one simple percentage more, who knows the consequences and the capabilities. I have always believed that what our society treats as “insane” and “sane” is nothing more than majority rules. As Nash said, “Insanity is more or less an issue of conformity…”
Monday, April 14, 2003
Does anyone agree, that quite possibly the freakiest thing done in any kind of scary or horror movie, or any movie with any supernatural motif at all, is when they have a character who stands still with their hands at their sides, and shakes their head uncontrollably with their chin tucked to their chest. I swear to you it freaks me out beyond comprehension. I do not know what it is about this that freaks me out, but for some reason seeing a head attached to a body lurch all over the place like that gives me the serious heebie jeebies. Other things that really freak me out: The sound of someone brushing their teeth...100 times worse than fingernails on the chalkboard, this sound can literally bring me to my knees in pain wincing. The first step back onto a ladder...Don't get me wrong, I'm not afraid of heights at all, I could climb a 900 foot ladder and never think twice, but when it's time to go down, that first step back onto the ladder does not sit so well with me; 99% of the time I'd rather just jump. The feeling, and heck, even the thought of a fingernail cut way too short, rubbing against some sort of fabric...Ahh that one gives me the chills just thinking about it. Watching someone else get cut...the weird part of this, is that I could slice myself an inch deep and not even blink, but if I see someone else get cut it freaks me out. It's not the blood, it's just the actual slice...ex. the scene on Robin Hood where Robin cuts his hand to bleed on his father's grave. Yikes. Old women...there are some exceptions to this rule, but for the most part, old women and other blue hairs really are scary. I don't know if it's the smell, the way they are wrinkly, or the way they sit too close to you when they talk, something about them doesn't sit well with me. Oddly enough, old men I think are cool, and don't scare me a bit. Lakes...lets face it, lakes are nothing more than fake oceans. How freaky is a body of water that doesn't refresh itself? VERY freaky. Not to mention, the lake in my hometown, Canyon Ferry, has an entire town buried beneath it; complete with a houses, old stores, and get this, a church and graveyard. That is wrong. I know oceans have scary things at the bottom as well, but it's still not the same.
These are just a few everyday things that really leave me unsettled. Again, anyone have any others to add to the list, post a comment.
Sunday, April 13, 2003
I was thinking today about inventions that I have come to just absolutely adore, and could not imagine life without. Due to the amount of time spent thinking about this in my head, I decided to dedicate this post to inventions that I love. Here goes: The Stapler - I don't know who figured it out, but they were smarter than I, in one small invention the use of dog-ears, paper clips, and the pesky binding process was eradicated forever...except for people like me who never have staples. The Microwave - I don't know how, I don't know why, I don't know if the waves will kill me, but I love it. Who doesn't like the ability to cook some tasty burrito with radiation in a minutes time? No one that is who. The Camera - Digital, 35mm, Instant, I do not care, the camera is amazing. If I could go back in time, I'd invent the camera first, cause what a cool thing to be associated with. The T.V. Dinner - I really believe the Microwave person, and the T.V. Dinner person were lovers and decided to shock the world by coming out with the inventions simultaneously. I am unaware if the two actually came out at the same time, but it seems like a conspiracy to me. The Guitar - La guitarra is the best, an instrument that can speak volumes with 6(or 12) thin little strings of steel. The most versatile instrument for the conveyance of emotion hands down, it can weep, scream, laugh, or calm, I am lucky to play it. Women - I have to give it up to God on this one, what a seriously impressive invention. From their physical appearance to the way they always know how to take care of me, women are probably the coolest invention on this list. The Internet - By far and away the invention that has increased laziness the most, well maybe besides the car. How cool is an invention that lets you order pizza, buy underwear, watch movies, chat to friends, and Learn, if you so desire, all in the same place? Very cool my friends, Very cool. Slang - I love that American English has so deviated from the English that founded our nation. Now our language is filled with abbreviations,(I am particularly fond of abbrevations) cool familiar words to refer to people you care about, and even variations on swear words so you can swear without really swearing. Colloquialisms have taken over our speech patterns, and I dig it man. Gatorade - I know it was made by those scientists that worked for the University of Florida, and I love them for it. How cool is an invention that can quench thirst, replace lost electrolytes, and look cool being dumped all over a winning football coach. It is cool, trust me. Bamboo Wind Chimes - While not "modern" this still had to make my list because I love them so much. There is nothing better than the sound of hollowed out pieces of dried bamboo tinklilng together softly while you try to sleep. Seriously, there is nothing cooler, especially when the sound of waves is accompanying it. The Razor - Despite the fact that even if there were never such a thing as a razor, men and women would have found ways to remove unwanted hair, the razor is still awesome. Without this little devil I'd be a hairy little moron, and I am sure that the invention of Women would pay no attention to me=Not a good thing. Therefore the razor stays. Thank You Mach 3.
There it is, the first post of my favorite cool inventions. If you want more, post a comment, let me know.
Saturday, April 12, 2003
30 grams of protein, in bar form, tastes like solidified vomit. Seriously, I think they have some gigantic man stuffing his face with peanut butter rice krispy treats and Hershey's bars in a lab, that throws up every hour on the hour and that substance is then cooled, molded into bar shape, coated again with chocolate, wrapped up in shiny airtight wrappers, and then distributed all over the nation. GNC knows this, grocery stores know this, yet nothing is done. The reason I know there is something just a little bit strange with all this protein bar nonsense, is that protein itself, does not taste like solidified vomit. Companies like "Junga Juice" and the likes have found ways to put 30 grams of powdered protein into their smoothies with no negative effects or drastic changes in taste. Tonight my protein bar of choice was "Double Chocolate Crunch" made by the Premier Nutrition company. Upon opening the shiny white wrapper(see link) I smelled an enticing mix of chocolate, chocolate, and crunch, whatever that smells like. Upon taking my first bite, I tasted the stomach contents of that gigantic man, up-chucked into aforementioned shiny white wrapper...a delightful mix of chocolate, rice krispies, and dried milk. Yum. With all of the money going to athletes for endorsing various shoes, clothing lines, soft drinks and even cologne for goodness sake, why can they not drop some cash into the area of protein bars and the tastes that accompany them? I'm all for staying in shape, exercising daily and trying to get stronger and I must admit, look better nekkid, but when you have skinny genes like mine(Thanks Daddy-O!!) it can be a little extra work to add bulk; as a result, Protein Bars must be turned to. At any rate, I wonder how much they pay the fat man to throw up in my wrapper, cause I was thinking about it, I could do that job no problem, Rice Krispy treats are amazing.
Friday, April 11, 2003
I watched "Natural Born Killers" last night, and I just have one thing to say. WOW. I really think that Oliver Stone is a genius...a demented, perverted, insane genius, but a genius nevertheless. Despite the fact that the script was written by Tarantino, another insane genius, Stone still managed to completely stylize it to the point of satire. The movie is technically amazing, shot with nearly 3,000 cuts...for those of you who do not know, most movies contain anywhere from 500-700. The editing on this picture took 11 months alone. Poor guys. I just found it absolutely stunning, from the clips of violence that have been scattered about television, movies, music, and the rest of modern "entertainment" that Stone puts in unconventional areas, such as behind windows, and surrounding the car as Mickey and Mallory drive, to the color and film format changes that casually slip in and out of the standard realm. All around this movie is twisted, and shocking. At any rate, it brings up an interesting question...are killers "natural born" or are they products of their environment...or are they possibly both?
The characters Mickey and Mallory in the movie can be argued to be both, but I really think they are products of their environment, not naturally born to be killers, despite what Mickey says. Both were abused, pestered, tortured, and mentally destroyed by their fathers. As a result of this severe abuse, both "know the difference between right and wrong...they just don't care." I think that if you look back over the course of the past two centuries, the majority of the psycho and sociopaths have that common link of a disturbed childhood. I find it extremely hard to believe that people are "killers" out of the womb, but when they grow up in environments that are so conducive to violence and apathetic regard to humanity, what can you expect? Furthermore, with the current state of our penal system, the increasing then decreasing then increasing again focus on rehabilitation as a crime deterrent, those who commit such acts have far less respect for the authority they have known all their lives to disobey. It is hard to say whether such men and women are "naturally born" that way, but when the family life is so disgusting and awful, it is hard to say they are not. Anyway, the movie is deranged, and an excellent satire on violence, and the media's portrayal of it. The most ironic part of the entire film is the simple fact that a love story is the silky smooth thread that weaves its way through the film, and ties it all together. I recommend to everyone, except maybe my Mom.
Thursday, April 10, 2003
I have been thinking a lot today about the subject of Reality Television. With the war filling the news networks, Major League Baseball and the Masters Golf tourney filling the sports networks, the other non-specific channels are left to fill in the spaces. I know the whole explosion of reality tv's popularity began quite some time ago, but I see it getting nothing but worse. Every network on television today has some show about an emergency room, some drama about police officers, or crime scene investigators, or shows with "real people" in "real situations" to find out what happens when people stop being polite, and start being "real." Give me a break. What is real about living in Las Vegas, NV on an entire floor of the Palms Casino for free? What is real about 7 people hand picked by rich Los Angeles socialites to produce the greatest amount of drama, with the least amount of effort? Nothing. Then there are the shows like "Survivor" and its many imitators. Why do we as a nation care so deeply about who gets voted off the island next, or who cheats on who on "Temptation Island," or even worse, which dumb girl/guy the Bachelor/ette chooses to give it a go with? I am embarrased that shows like these continue to get better ratings than Dateline, 60 Minutes, or the channels I love most like TLC, Discovery, MSNBC, whatever. What is worse, is these shows only constitute the "non-fiction" half of reality tv.
Not only is America capitvated and obsessed with the non-fiction reality shows, but also increasingly with the made-up, well-casted melodramas that litter the 60 channels my tv recieves. We are planning our meals, our work, our lives around fake doctors fixing fake injuries in fake hospitals; fake cops devoting fake lives to solving fake crimes, and putting fake bad guys away for the rest of their fake lives; whether Dawson and Joey get back together, which "Friend" Rachel will end up with. What does this say about our society? There is a war going on and Rachel and Dawson take priority. Wow.
Many people will argue that during this time of war and unrest, TV is exactly what our nation needs. Many will argue that television is an escape...a path away from the hardships and injustices of the real world that we all live in. I could not disagree more. If we need an "escape" from the world we live in, why are we choosing to escape to shows that focus on murder, Special Victims Units that deal with sexual crimes, disease and injury and death in emergency rooms, or the daily fights and hook-up dramas on "Real World" or "Road Rules." I think all in all, our nation is in a sad state of affairs. I am not saying I am any better however, personally I'm pretty mad that "Dawson's Creek" only has 5 episodes left EVER. If Joey doesn't end up with Pacey I'm gonna be chapped. War? What war? My TV schedule is already filled.
Wednesday, April 09, 2003
True to his form as one of my best friends, Kevin Hanson read my blog, about the realization concerning the ocean, and emailed me back with an amazing quote concerning it. The quote was from John F. Kennedy during his speech at the America's Cup in the 1960's. It is as follows:
"I really don't know why it is that all of us are so committed to the sea, except I think it is because in addition to the fact that the sea changes and the light changes, and ships change, it is because we all came from the sea. And it is an interesting biological fact that all of us have, in our veins the exact same percentage of salt in our blood that exists in the ocean, and, therefore, we have salt in our blood, in our sweat, in our tears. We are tied to the ocean. And when we go back to the sea, whether it is to sail or to watch it we are going back from whence we came." -JFK-
Also staying true to his form, as those of you who know him will attest, Kevin also pointed out that it has been observed by scientists and the like that our blood actually has three times less salt than the ocean does. Nevertheless, I love the quote. Thanks Kev.
Tuesday, April 08, 2003
I came to a major realization again tonight. For all those who remember my major epiphany about 5 months ago, this epiphany was equal to, if not greater than the first. For those of you unfamiliar, I will give you a short summary of the first. The first realization was that I needed mountains in my life...big, snow capped mountains always looming on the horizon, never far from where I was. I thought I needed a house with a lot of land around it, in some place where winter outlasted summer, and the air had a chill. I thought I needed a husky dog, a spacious cabin-like home, and a warm fire. Today I realized, I thought wrong.
Well, maybe half wrong. I know somewhere inside me I need those things, somewhere they are part of me, but the majority of Me, is somewhere else. When I walked outside today, I felt the sun on my face. I realized at that moment that what I really need in my life is a temperate climate. I need a beach, I need an ocean, I need palm trees and sand. I need to smell salt air, and I need to smell the rain as it soaks into the shore. So in reality, this is not a new realization, as I've known these things all my life, I just call it a realization because I re-realized what was important to me. Essentially, I think what would be the perfect situation, was that I had enough money to have a home on the ocean, in some amazing warm place, and a cabin-like home in the mountains somewhere, with snow capped peaks looming on the horizon. If anyone out there knows how to make this dream a reality, or wishes to donate any money towards my cause...feel free.
"Don't look for miracles. You, yourself, are the miracle." - Henry Miller
On a different note, the canyon-sized gap in my jeans is officially closed. I patched it up like a bridge spanning a gorge, and it's magnificent. There are some slight wrinkles around the edges of it due to pulling the fishing line too tightly while sewing, but otherwise it is great. I love that around the patch there are frayed jean-strings curled up and clouding over it. These jeans are a perfect example of my style. I'm proud.
Monday, April 07, 2003
Sunday, April 06, 2003
One more thing, Daylight Savings Time is weird.
Friday, April 04, 2003
1) Celebrities. In the United States, and probably worldwide, celebrities are in a very sad state of affairs. Further, I believe that there are different levels of celebrity-hood, with each level directly stroking the collective ego's of the level directly above them...their ego's stroked by the level directly below. Example: "LaLa" from TRL was interviewing Vin Diesel today and the entire interview was nothing more than LaLa oohing and aahing about every thing that came out of his mouth...be it his "sexy voice" his "amazing arms" or his acting ability. Wait a tick, acting ability...Vin Diesel...same sentence? Clearly things are going too far.
2) Music. The music in this nation is going downhill, Fast. It seems to me that every single day that passes another boy band, punk band, alternative girl singer, pop princess, or rap star emerges. MTV has been ignored on my television for over a week, and when I turned it on today there were at least 8 people on the countdown that I'd never heard of. America's new favorites, the next big thing? No, the flavor of the week, the next breed of one hit wonders. Where have bands like the Stones, U2, the Beatles, Zeppelin, Bob Marley, The Boss, or Bob Dylan gone? Today we are slapped in the face by 50 Cent, B2K, 3LW and every other flash in the pan, "follow the leader," pathetic group of people who have the audacity to call themselves musicians. The emergence of someone or something truly new and great is a rarity and when they do their airtime and success is still measured up to the N*Sync's and the Rapper of the Week, where it most often falls short. Thank God that those few great bands still going are indeed Still Going. There are a few great bands/musicians out there today, I just hope their faces do not get lost in the TRL crowd, drowned out by screaming teenagers fighting to give a "shout-out" in the picture-in-picture during some awful video.
3) "News." For far too many in our generation, news is a topic that is becoming skewed to a point of absurdity. Today during the TRL broadcast they took about 10 minutes to do an important News Flash. Obviously given the war that the nation is immersed in, I was expecting something concerning our troops, or Saddam, or even a random night-vision video of some tank being bombed. Obviously not. Instead some girl named Souchin Pak came on, dressed like an anime cartoon in a Cher costume, and said that the breaking news of the day was not about the war, rather it was about Lance Bass, a singer in N*Sync. Apparently he is a judge on some NBC "American Idol" wannabe show, but even more "breaking" about this newscast is that he is also making an appearance on "The Pet Psychic," because his dog Jack has a bladder control problem. According to Pak, Bass commented: "He just needs to learn the right times to go." Wow. How riveting. The scarier fact, this is NEWS to our generation.
4) Literature. This generation doesn't even have a name. We're not the "Beat Generation," not the "Post-Modernists," not the "Romantics;" the quality of the novel in this generation is so sad, and if it keeps up I am terrified what will be left behind as a representation of this era for our children's children's children. Will they read Stephen King novels and marvel at its metaphoric genius? Will they read Tom Clancy and paint the pages yellow with highlights, analyzing and examining each sentance? The answer, a heartbreaking NO. Think about it, in the past 10 years how many novels have been released that are truly revolutionary? The argument must be made however that perhaps no novel achieves greatness until far after its time, but still 99% of the novels released today are either sequels, books based on movies, or formulaic pieces of work that are as predictable as Scream 5, or Rush Hour 4. This nation, this generation in its entirety is Starving for something new, something bold, something Timeless for God's sake.
5) Change. A change is coming, like winds blowing a settled storm from a valley, change is coming. I think it is starting as a whisper, but soon it will be a scream. Slowly more musicians are coming out that actually write their own lyrics, actually play their own instruments, pour out their hearts and souls with each G chord, with each strained vocal. Slowly the youth of today are trying to belong, trying to stake their claim on the time line of history, no matter how small a blip that claim may be. Granted I am disappointed in those protesting for the sake of protesting, not really knowing what they stand for, but at least they are trying to stand for something. I see the apathy of our generation starting to melt away like snow in Spring, and I know the relief when it does melt will be just as great. Perhaps I am just optimistic, but I see a change coming and it is good to see. Affluence and apathy have been the adjectives of choice for our generation and I really hope that all of us are starting to take offense to that, and make a change that will prove that despite the relative luxury and ease that surrounds these times, we still care. Maybe it needs to start with TRL falling, toppled like a archaic Empire so ripe for dismantling. I see the change coming, I just think it needs a little help.
All that in an hour and a half of Total Request Live. My goodness.
Thursday, April 03, 2003
At any rate, as the title indicates, this post is about what you would wish for if you had one "frivolous" wish to use. By frivolous I mean a wish that ignores the typical, "world peace" or whatever other cliche answers people always give, and goes into what you'd wish if you HAD to wish for something material, or tangible...a dream wish, if you will. Now, onto my wish.
My One Frivolous Wish, if given the chance to wish it, would be for my life to have a Soundtrack. Let me expand. When I say I want my life to have a soundtrack, I do not just mean a few theme songs that go along with how I live, no no...I mean a full fledged, 24 hour a day musical score that sometimes only I can hear, and other times those around me can as well. For example, imagine that I just met a girl, and I have walked her home and am getting ready to say goodnight...in the background some soft acoustic song that portrays the anxiety, romance, and tension in the air would be playing in my head, perfectly filling the silent spaces between the words that we speak. Then as we lean in to have our first kiss a song like "The State We're In" by The Chemical Brothers would play audible to both of us. Here again I must expand. When I say that both of us would be hearing this music, I do not mean that the music would sound as though it would have a source, like some stereo planted nearby, rather I mean that whenever the music was audible to anyone other than me, the music would wrap around everyone, coming from everywhere and nowhere all at the same time. Think of watching a movie, or a television show with perfectly selected songs, or instrumentals, that say everything that words and images can not. I truly feel that music is the most effective tool in understanding me, it gets me excited when I need to be, makes me think thoughts I have never thought before, holds my head and dries my tears when I am sad, gives me hope when there isn't any...I love it. Anyways, there is my wish...I wish for a soundtrack to accompany my life, always and forever, saying all the things I can not.
Please tell me yours, and I will post them.
"My gunner just had a sweet shot to some enemy sniper's head...got him right in the head." -Some Marine-
"Jesus! A bullet just hit right behind our head on the hummer, 3 inches from the Colonel...Colonel you may want to get behind the van, that shot almost hit you..." -Bob Arnot, eerily calm, during his report-
"LAY DOWN YOUR ARMS, YOU ARE ABOUT TO LOSE YOUR LIFE, YOU WILL BE DEAD" -U.S. Marine Translator yelling to enemy troops-
"Hey Jim, come over here, you're in the direct line of fire, I don't want you to get shot." -Bob Arnot, to his photographer-
"You can tell by their faces, you can tell we're doing a lot of good out here..." -U.S. Marine referring to the faces of the children just saved from enemy fire-
"Ok, we're not safe, if we get hit by a rocket or mortar, it's all over...sure a good sniper could take us out, gotta watch out for those" -Bob, to a moronic woman anchor in D.C.-
All in all, Bob Arnot, a Doctor, Embedded Reporter, fluent Arabic speaker, is insane. Very cool, but certifiably insane.
Wednesday, April 02, 2003
At any rate, here is a schedule that everyone should go to so they can see when the games will be televised on ESPN or whatever other channel, so you can see my Dad going out to offer words of wisdom to the pitchers on the mound. Congratulations Daddy-O, you deserve this!
Tuesday, April 01, 2003
I watched Red Dragon today and I must say it is arguably the best in the Hannibal Lecter series. The movie was suspensful, psychologically engaging, and had Ed Norton, Anthony Hopkins, and Ralph Fiennes all acting at the top of their game. The movie really got me thinking about how disturbing serial killers are. I can not fathom the mindset that would allow a person to 1) Justify such brutal and violent actions such as murder, rape, or at its most extreme, cannibalism; and even worse B) Allow a person to actually enjoy and derive some form of pleasure from these acts. Granted a large majority of serial killers/rapists have extreme childhoods and backgrounds, but still, an even larger majority of people with the same backgrounds do not fall into such lifestyles. If you go to the Crime Library you can read all about different aspects of not only serial killers, but other notorious figures in America's history. It's pretty graphic reading, but very interesting. I just realized I really like to learn new things, no matter what it is about.
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